Frankly Speaking ........Now!
Renewal from mistakes!


Dear Friend,


I will just be myself as I write to you and let you know my thoughts and my feelings. The things that I write are just that.  They are biased, being based on my experience, past, failures, strengths, etc. I trust the Lord to anoint my thoughts and the things that I write… praying that He will lead me and guide me in everything that I present.  Ultimately, it is the Holy Spirit that will lead us into all truth and understanding!  

Please receive this council as such and use it as the tool it was meant.  May it bring you closer to the Lord and bring healing, deliverance and strength as you seek the Lord for understanding and discernment in the test and trial that has come your way. Ha, that sounded a little like a disclaimer, didn’t it?  I just wanted to remind you of some of the things that we have talked about.


The Lord truly is amazing in all things.  He is so good.  He is our refuge and our strength, our very present help in times of trouble.  We can come boldly unto His throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace in time of need.  He has been tried and tested.  He has been found faithful in all things.  No matter what is going on around us, He is there.  Even in the most difficult of circumstance, He is with us. 

Though it seems like an impossible situation, He reminds us that nothing is too difficult for Him.  When there seems to be no way and death is all around us, He continues to breathe a renewing wind upon our faces.  When all we see is cracked and dry, He brings streams and rivers where there should be none and makes a way where there is no way. 

May He continue to “wow” us in every situation that we find ourselves.  Let us not look upon the things that are seen, but the things which are not seen, remembering that the things which are seen are just temporary…they are just momentary, light afflictions that are producing eternal joy! 


As I have tried to remind you, it is so easy to get the “wrong” focus.  No matter what we are facing we cannot let that steal our “main” focus.  Remember the twelve spies all experienced the same thing.  They all saw the same thing, but they responded in different ways.  Joshua and Caleb wholly followed the Lord.  They believed God and stood upon what God had already promised and said no matter what they saw or experienced.  Their focus was right.  It wasn’t based upon their five senses.  It was based upon the 6th sense of faith.  They believed God and saw things differently because of their “right focus”. 

The other ten walked by sight (senses).  They didn’t believe what God had already promised because of their “wrong focus” and brought an evil report of the land.  You already know the outcome.  Joshua and Caleb were the only ones to see the “promised land.”  You too have a “promised land” of a restored marriage and family.  Remember to keep a “right focus”.  Walk by faith and not by sight. 

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not unto your own understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path and make it straight. 


Remember the enemy, our thoughts and our flesh are all battling against us.  There are so many mirrors, smoke screens and voices trying to distract us from the truth.  I pray that the Lord will give you supernatural discernment during this time to hear His voice in the midst of all the commotion.  May you hear His still small voice as He whispers His will into the depths of your spirit.  May His directions and strategies become clearer and louder as you fine tune your ear to hear as you seek Him with all of your heart. 


Another thing that we have talked about is praying Psalms 51.  There are some key points that we need to focus upon during this season and there is a reason for each.  The first thing I want to know is that I am “right” before God, because I want Him to answer my prayers.  I want Him to reveal any hindrance in my life that would prevent Him from working fully in my situation.  I want to ask His forgiveness in all of the areas He reveals. 


Psalm 139:23-24
Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts: 24 And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.


Psalm 51:1
To the chief Musician, A Psalm of David, when Nathan the prophet came unto him, after he had gone in to Bathsheba. Have mercy upon me, O God, according to thy lovingkindness: according unto the multitude of thy tender mercies blot out my transgressions.


There is something deeper than even forgiveness.  Maybe it is a part of forgiveness, but a deeper step that many fail to apply.  We want the forgiveness, but we never stay there long enough for the next step.  It is the place where habits are broken, roots are pulled up, strongholds are destroyed, guilt is removed, etc.  It is the place of washing.


Psalm 51:2-3 (KJV)
Wash me thoroughly from mine iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin. For I acknowledge my transgressions: and my sin is ever before me.


There are some things that we continue to do.  They may be habits we cannot break or characteristics and traits about us that need to change.  It could be the way we treat other people or how we react and respond in certain situations.  Whatever the situation, many of them are ever before us.  We have acknowledged them and received forgiveness, but they are not completely removed until we let the Lord apply the deeper aspect of forgiveness. 

Lord, wash me thoroughly.  Thank you for your forgiveness, but now wash me thoroughly.  Ha!  That makes me smile!  I don’t know why I had not seen that more fully until just recently, but it is a “freeing” revelation as we let the Lord wash us thoroughly from so much of the accumulated “dirt” of our past. 


Psalm 51:6-7
Behold, You desire truth in the inward parts, And in the hidden part You will make me to know wisdom. 7 Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; Wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow. 

He reveals, we acknowledge, ask forgiveness and He washes thoroughly.
  This is repeated as necessary.  Let’s don’t forget the process or the pattern.  We need to continually be washed white as snow by the blood of Jesus Christ and by the washing of the water of the Word.  There were several things He has dealt with me about and several that I am still going through the process.   I am in the shower on several and with many others I am in the “heavy soil, deep scrub” cycle.  Ha!


In my life, it got rid of “secret agent man”.   He was the one that no one knew about.  He was the one I kept hidden and would not let God be a part.  It was the area where no light would shine because he liked it dark.  He had a cape, a mask and was always dressed in black.  He was my thorn in the flesh.  He was the area that Satan could gain an entrance.  Secret agent man kept me from so many things. He quenched God’s best, but I allowed him to stay year after year.  There came a time when I got tired of S.A.M., but it was not until I looked upon all of the devastastion that was left behind as I had allowed him access into my life. 

Thank goodness that I can finally say and understand
Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead,  I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.” 


After the acknowledging, forgiving and deep cleansing (wash me thorougly) and revealing comes another part that we have to allow God to do.  It is the rebuilding process.  It is like He destroys sin and its effects through the first part, but He has to replace it with something new.  It is like changing clothes.  We take off our dirty ones, take a bath and then put on brand new ones. 


Ephesians 4:22-24

That you put off, concerning your former conduct, the old man which grows corrupt according to the deceitful lusts, and be renewed in the spirit of your mind, and that you put on the new man which was created according to God, in true righteousness and holiness.


There seems to be a pattern of putting off or taking off, washing thoroughly, creating and renewing, then putting on.  I hope you can see it as we go along and the Lord is showing you some things.  It takes the whole process and I believe that we personally need to go through the whole process or we will continue to have problems in our relationships, families and personal lives.  It should be a joy that the Lord loves us enough to continue to reveal those areas that He wants to bring “freedom!”


Psalm 51:10-12
Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me. Cast me not away from thy presence; and take not thy holy spirit from me. Restore unto me the joy of thy salvation; and uphold me with thy free spirit.


Look at what He does afterwards.  Look at the four words.  Create, renew, restore and uphold.  These are all works of the spirit.  This is something that the Lord does. He replaces what He forgives and washes away with His heart, spirit, joy and He upholds us with His strength and power as we continue to apply His pattern to our lives.

There is so much more to this, but I am not going to write a book right now, even though I am going to write books and new songs.  Pray that He will do these things in your life.  Your focus will change as you do.


Another thing that we have talked about is access.  We know that we have access to the Father.  One of the ways we gain access is by the Holy Spirit.  Another way is through our faith. We also have a mediator in Christ Jesus and we enter into the holy of holies by the blood of Jesus.


Timothy 2:5
For there is one God and one Mediator between God and men, the Man Christ Jesus


Ephesians 2:18
For through Him we both have access by one Spirit to the Father.


Ephesians 3:11-13
According to the eternal purpose which He accomplished in Christ Jesus our Lord, in whom we have boldness and access with confidence through faith in Him. Therefore I ask that you do not lose heart at my tribulations for you, which is your glory.


Hebrews 10:19
Therefore, brethren, having boldness to enter the Holiest by the blood of Jesus


What I guess I am trying to say is that right now you do not have access to your wife, but you do the Father.  You need to go to the one you have access to and plead your case before Him.  He has access to her.  His Holy Spirit dwells in both of you.  Yes, we still have to open the door of our hearts and listen to His voice.  Ask the One who has access to her heart to speak to her on your behalf.  As you lift her needs, desires, wishes and wants up in prayer, I believe that you will desire some of the same things. 

God always changes us and reveals to us new things to pray for as we become intercessors for other people.   He also will show us things that we need to change within ourselves as we pray for others that will help us gain access and prepare us for change.


Futhermore, just as we have a mediator, Jesus Christ, who brings peace between God and ourselves, you need an earthly mediator that will stand as a go between with you and your wife.  You need a MEDIATOR — one who goes between two groups or persons to help them work out their differences and come to agreement.

 A mediator usually is a neutral party, a go-between, intermediary, or arbitrator (Job 9:33; daysman) who brings about reconciliation in a hostile situation when divided persons are not able to work out their differences themselves. A mediator can also be the negotiator of an agreement. After the agreement is made, the mediator can then witnesses to its content and serve as the administrator or guarantor to make sure its provisions are followed. A mediator needs legal authority and recognized power to function effectively.

Pray that God will reveal a mediator that has access to both of you and that has both of your interests at heart.  Pray that this person will be neutral and unbiased toward your persons, but will be very biased in their views of marriage, restoration, deliverance, healing, etc.  Pray that they will be wise in day to day, earthly decisions, also.  I believe with you that God will do His part to soften matters and let us trust Him together that a mediator will be revealed and step up to the plate and bat for both of you!


There are so many other things that we have talked about, but these seem to be the most important. There is wisdom in council.


Proverbs 11:14
Where there is no counsel, the people fall; But in the multitude of counselors there is safety.


Proverbs 15:22
Without counsel, plans go awry, But in the multitude of counselors they are established.


You have access to some great council.  There are well known people who will answer your call and help advise you with direction, encouragement and hope.  The Lord uses both of them greatly.  He may chose to reveal a strategy or a plan.  They may hear or know a name to recommend to you.  When we put things into God’s hands anything is possible.  Use your access wisely.  Let the Lord show you who to go to.  He is faithful.  It may be someone we have forgotten.  Seek Him in this matter.  I know that He will reveal it to you.


We have also talked about the arrows of deliverance and the weapons of our warfare. 


2 Kings 13:17-19
And he said, “Open the east window”; and he opened it. Then Elisha said, “Shoot”; and he shot. And he said, “The arrow of the Lord’s deliverance and the arrow of deliverance from Syria; for you must strike the Syrians at Aphek till you have destroyed them. 18 Then he said, “Take the arrows”; so he took them. And he said to the king of Israel, “Strike the ground”; so he struck three times, and stopped. And the man of God was angry with him, and said, “You should have struck five or six times; then you would have struck Syria till you had destroyed it! But now you will strike Syria only three times.”


This was the last thing that Elisha was involved in before He died, also…by the way!


Ephesians 6:12
For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.


It is in the attitude of Moses…..”Let my people go!”


It is in the attitude of David……”Is there not a cause!” 

There needs to be a holy anger against the powers of darkness for the influence against our families, friends, etc.  It is time we have the attitude against the giants in our lives.  We need to slay them and deliverance needs to come to our families.  Let my family go!


I know our paths have crossed for a reason.  It may only be for a season, but I trust God that He will accomplish what He pleases and His purposes will be fulfilled.  I agree with you that God will supply all of your needs while you are here and always.  I agree with you that He will release strategies, ideas and plans to get your family back. I believe with you that He is going to bring restoration and deliverance.  I believe that He is going to reveal weaknesses, hindrances and barriers that need to be broken and repaired. 

May He show you the “keys” that unlock access and open closed doors. May He give you wisdom in the choices you make.  May they be God ordained and God delivered.  Wait upon the Lord for His instructions as it will be those that will bring a quick work. 

Don’t get weary in well doing because in due season you will reap a reward if you faint not.  Day to day decisions will continue.  They will require your attention.  Don’t let them become distractions.  Don’t dwell upon them too long.  Cast all your care upon Him because He cares for you.  Be anxious for nothing, but in everything, through prayer and thanksgiving, let your requests be made known unto God, and the peace of God that passes all understanding will keep your heart and mind through Christ Jesus. 

Bring every thought unto the obedience of Christ.  Cast down vain imaginations and every high thing that exalts itself against the things you know to be true.  Stand upon His word and think upon good things.


Philippians 4:8 Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things.


Agreeing with you in prayer,



Frank Withers

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